Food News

Local woman makes excuses for not buying food she’s sampling

Cincinnati, OH: Local woman Jessica Pattern was seen making excuses for not buying the beef brisket she sampled at the Springdale Costco Friday. 

“It’s delicious,” she reportedly said. “But the cart is filled to the gills! I’ll pick this up next time for sure.” 

Pattern was not available for comment, but additional details emerged after an exclusive interview with the sample lady. “I really don’t care if she buys it, I get paid the same either way,” she said. “But she kept going on about her diet and how full her cart was while I was trying to manage the crock pot and fill more Solo cups with brisket.”

Unnamed sources say a line for brisket samples formed behind the woman. Her performance was described by passersby as self indulgent and excessive.

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